I'm gonna have a badass scar
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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