wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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