sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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