You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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