i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
No subtext here. People are naked.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
