Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize
