Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Randomize
