Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
