she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
