please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
