He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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