Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
