we have pet lesbian snakes
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
