I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!