I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
