brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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