Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
