ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
