No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
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hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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