weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
lol hangovers are for mortals.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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