you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Your cock deserves a montage
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
