i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Randomize