She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
