i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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