just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I am available for nakedness
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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