I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
