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• (971): View more from Oregon

  I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.

  (971): View more from Oregon

  Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  I just woke up to me licking the dognuts

  (623): View more from Arizona

  You mean Doughnuts?

  (602): View more from Arizona

  ......No :(

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• (305): View more from Florida

  Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.

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• (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own

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• (212): View more from New York

  Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.

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