is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
