yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
