My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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