office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
