they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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