Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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