just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I believe in your delicious
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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