Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize