girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I think your dad took our porno
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
