dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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