I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize