White coat. Heels.
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
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