i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
