Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
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I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
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I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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