Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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