yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
