If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
