is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
