drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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