As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just sucked dick on a ferry
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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