I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize
