Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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