I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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