Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize