Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize